I would be embarrassed to tell you how many times it took me to learn this lesson. And it wasn’t just as a child. For some genetically ingrained reason, I have always chosen to learn the hard way.
Emily’s poem #292 begins with “If your nerve deny you.” I believe she goes on to say that we should send fear packing. Tell it to go lean on a grave. Death is waiting for all of us, but we must live in the meantime and nourish our souls.
My nerve has denied me on multiple occasions. I’ve been afraid to do quite a few things in my life. To speak in front of groups without my heart palpitating out of my chest took years. When I went skydiving ,I had to be bumped out by the instructor. It ended up being one of the most amazing experiences of my life. Sometimes pride interceded, and said I could not let myself fail at this, sometimes foolishness stepped in and said aww, come on, do it- it’ll be fine, sometimes my heart said yes when it should have said no, and sometimes my mind overthought the situation so much that a chance was missed. And then there were the times I listened to my gut. When it told me to turn away, slow the roll, dive in or take the leap. My gut has never steered me wrong, but I didn’t always listen to it, and that took me naked, down some brambly ass paths.
Here’s to all of us paying attention to that little voice inside our gut, the one that says hey you, this is not good for you or yes, that is good for you, stay off this brambly ass path, or you’ll be fine, just wear some protective clothing!